Well, it sure is nice to see you back here on the blog. You know it usually takes me half a page to give a proper hello, but I’m going to bypass my innate want to tell you over-and-over how much I like you coming on over to read these posts because we have much to talk about:
May is quickly approaching, and I don’t feel bad about pulling a jump-ahead over the month of April. Why? Because great things are going to happen in May, people. And that’s what we’re going to discuss:
Okay, first and foremost, there are going to be ridiculous amounts of good things happening in the incandescent world of music. To make sure I get them all in, we’re going to make a chronological list of what’s going to happen, along with some other things happening this May of 2010. Most of them are on here so that I’ll do a good job of keeping-up with things:
1 May
Things to remember:
Seriously think about starting to study for final exams.
2 May
Things to remember:
Okay, now really start studying for exams. Really.
3 May
Events:
Birthday Eve
Things to remember:
Learn everything humanly possible, well, sort-of, about: the history of paintin’ and the good people who did it, the minds who talked and what they said, communicating with the masses, the discouragement of holy matrimony.
4 May
Albums:
Broken Social Scene “Forgiveness Rock Record”
New Pornographers “Together”
Events:
Turn 20, but don’t celebrate too much, on account of: 1. Art History Exam 2. Philosophy Exam 3. Speech Final 4. Marriage & Family (yes, the class is just as the title states) Exam. And THEN, cram stuff about Anatomy for exam the next day. Pretty sure the universe is saying: “happy (insert explicit word that begins with ‘f’ , and tack an ‘ing’ right there on the end) birthday.”
Things to remember (this one’s for you, good reader):
Send help and bring balloons.
5 May
Events:
Cinco De Mayo
Anatomy Final
Things to remember:
Send more help and bring tacos.
[jump-on-ahead to the 8th of May]
8 May
Events:
Betty White hosts SNL with the musical sounds of Jay-Z, and I couldn’t have even imagined a more-perfect match-up.
[we’re skipping a few days, but that sure-as-hell ain’t to say that nothing exciting won’t happen between Saturday night and May 11th]
11 May
Albums:
Kaskade “Dynasty”
Keane “Night Train”
The National “High Violet”
Sleigh Bells “Treats”
Woods “At Echo Lake”
WAIT, did you hear me? I said HIGH VIOLET. That’s right, I know we’ve waited for what’s felt like forever, but we’ll finally be able to hold The National’s new album right here in our hands. AND, they’re already streaming it. And I’d like to take this moment to thank the good people over at the NY Times for doing so. Not only was I super-exited to listen-on-in, but there is also some good reading to be had by all, but I stopped somewhere around the third page. Don’t worry, though. I plan on reading it all tonight. Anyhow, I want you to be able to experience it, so here’s the link. You’re welcome:
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/25/magazine/25national-t.html?pagewanted=1
let’s talk about it for a little bit:
Alright, that first song is going to blow your mind, but you’ll have to sew it back up, because it’s just gonna keep on happening. All of the songs are completely boss, but I’d just like to state that the song called “England” has got to be a shout-out to Manheim Steamroller. Trust me, you’ll hear it, and you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. Also, “Lemonworld” is just flat-out great, and so is everything else. I can’t get enough of it. Make a date with that article, click that playlist on the left, and don’t ever stop listening. I am being completely serious. Especially that last song. Gees.
[skipping ahead again]
18 May
Albums:
Band of Horses “Infinite Arms”
The Black Keys “Brothers”
LCD Sound system “This Is Happening”
[skip almost ten days, but not quite]
27 May
Sex and the City Two will be playing in a theater near you. That rhymed, and I am super-excited about it.
Okay, those were the important things going to happen in May, among many others that you’ll just have to see about on your own. Also, I have lots o’ friends who have birthdays in this great month, and know that those are definitely on my calendar, because birthdays are super-important. Plus, that means that lots of my people are fellow members of the Taurus segment of Astrology. IDEA! I am totally going to write a post all about Astrology, because it blows my mind. Really. It’s so neat-o.
Wait, there’s more: I also just purchased some books. I am so excited to read some things that I actually went out and found on my own. And, as I was standing in line, I was just getting so excited about the four books I had. And about the Bicycle Eco-Friendly deck of cards. And the two bookmarks I bought that look like little Oriental rugs. And the little Yankee Candle thing that hangs around for your car that smells like sunscreen and good times. But then, the girl who was behind the counter ruined it all.
[the following is a slightly long story. I can understand if you just want to bypass it, but I feel like it’s important for me to share it with you. If it pleases you to do so, continue on, and know that I will like you even more for doing so]
She was so obnoxious. I mean, really. She had quite possibly the highest, most nasal-ish, voice I have ever had the displeasure of listening to. And I felt sorry for her. I thought, “man, that’s got to be rough to have that voice,” but then she really started to talk. And she went through that whole song-and-dance of getting some piece of plastic card with the store name stamped on it, and I just sort of told her that I wasn’t really interested.
But she wouldn’t stop. And she was getting smart, and really, she was getting rude. I tried to be funny and alleviate the awkward situation, what with her giving me these dirty looks, and all. I told her that it was a good sales pitch, but she said it obviously wasn’t good enough. And I laughed. But she didn’t. She was honestly mad at me. And she started crunching numbers and telling me, in that awful voice she had, that I could have saved seven dollars. Wow. And then she said that I could I have nearly paid for half of the cost of the card in just one visit.
And she asked me if I shopped there often. And I said, “I guess so.” Clearly, that wasn’t good enough for her. She almost asked it as if I was illiterate. I know that sounds like I was reading (haha, pun definitely intended) too far into it, but you just had to hear the way she said it. And then I said that, really, you shouldn’t be all that frequent of a shopper in a bookstore. I mean, at some point, you actually go home and read the damn things.
Well, she kept on going. And she just kept on, and it really takes a good lot for me to get honestly ticked off at people, but holy smokes, I was there.
And then I said that I would gladly pay her the seven dollars that I could have saved, just to shut her the hell up. No, I didn’t really say that, but I did say it in my head. I’m good at maintaining my composure, and keepin’ it classy. And I guess that’s why I missed her saying that I didn’t have to fill out my check, because she was just going to give it right back. Which, that whole new situation makes me feel uncomfortable. I don’t want it back. That’s why I gave it to you.
Anyway, when I kept on filling it out, I can’t remember now exactly what she said, but I can remember that is was awfully snarky, but not in a good way. Snarky can be good. I always enjoy a snarky sense of humor, but she wasn’t being funny. Anyhow, a friend was most certainly not made that day, but I do have the books, and the cards, and the bookmarks, and the scented cardboard. And they are happily home safe with me and glad to be far-far-away from the girl who works behind the cash register. Also, if you should visit the Books-A-Million store, in this fair town of Kingsport, keep an eye out for her. Better yet, keep an ear out, because I was honestly partially deaf for at least twenty minutes.
At any rate, I sure am looking forward to reading those books and don’t worry. I’ll be sure to tell you all about them. Also, I put the little cardboard scented thing on the dashboard and I put my cell phone right there with it, and now, my phone has the scent like that of a new Cabbage Patch Kid. Epic win.
[okay, story’s over]
Also, one more thing. Before we get too pumped about May, let’s talk a little April, just out of common-courtesy to the current month: April does mean showers, but most importantly, it means prom. I’m not going to explain it all here, but just know that I have a video of E. Byerley that is hands-down, one of the most hilarious things you and me both will ever see. I can’t put it on here, by way of my phone, cause it’s too long, but if you should see me out, you just ask. And I will gladly show it to you.
Alright, my friends, now that you have so many good things to look forward to, this post has now reached its end. I know that makes you sad, but here’s two more things to look forward to, coming in the new month of May: flowers and new posts. Well, that seemed more exciting before I actually typed it.
Anyhow, May is going to be legendary, I am sure of it. So, mark those important events on your dry-erase calendars and let’s get excited.
And don’t stop thinkin’ about tomorrow, cause June will soon be here. And guess what that means? That’s right. Come June 1st, Clay Aiken’s new album is gonna drop like a ton of bricks.
[this is the part where you laugh]
Yours & soon to be a year-older,
katie beth
PS: I’ll be waiting by the mailbox for that birthday card you’re gonna send me. Also, I have no idea who that is in the bikini, but I can tell you one thing: I really like his style.
